Time for some real talk.
Our bodies are well and truly our nemesis. I cannot explain how many times a day my mind thinks about how I look, how I feel, how my body compares to others. I have been lucky enough to grow up in a family of women who never let me feel anything but love and confidence in my body. So how come I am still insecure about my appearance?
The issue is as women we have no escape. We are constantly scrutinised for being too thin, too fat, too flat chested, too curvy. We are criticised for having too much sex or not enough sex. For wearing too much make up and looking ‘caked’ or for not ‘bothering with our appearance’ if we go out with a naked face. We are called ‘man-haters’ for being ‘too feminist’ or we are told that we do not speak out enough. We’re told that our short skirts ‘invite’ trouble, yet we’re also made to believe that long skirts make us look like prudes. We have constant worries about looking ‘fat’ in pictures and DREAD our friends putting an unflattering picture of us on Instagram.
Ambar Driscoll, founder of The Bamby Collective (a safe community for women to share stories about their weight and self-confidence), carried out a survey recently. She found that 87% of almost 20,000 people said that social media makes them feel less confident about how they look. To be honest, am I surprised? After all, Instagram is a place of photoshopped bodies, airbrushed faces and is simply a highlight reel of our lives.
So, what can we do to help ourselves? Here’s 6 tips:
1) Follow people on Instagram who make you feel good about yourself.
Unfollow the accounts which make you feel rubbish. Get rid of those which tell you what you can and cannot eat, how to get abs in a week and how drinking green tea will reduce your bloat. Find women who support women and those who post ‘real’ photos. Most importantly remember that our photos do not define who we are, they are NOT an accurate depiction of our bodies 24/7. We are also guilty of the classic ‘suck in your belly and stick out your butt’ pose. I’ve left a list at the bottom of this post of some accounts which I love ♥️
2) Believe that you are enough.
This is 100% my personal enemy. If I am complimented it goes in one ear and out the other. If a boy slates my appearance, my God it sticks to my thoughts like super glue. Sometimes I feel like I’m a puppet on boy’s strings, being pulled back and forth. Well, enough is enough with these toxic thoughts. If anyone has ever insulted you then remind yourself that they are probably insecure in themselves, forgive them and forget. If you're complimented then believe it and don't deny it with a 'oh no I'm not' answer. Give yourself the same amount of love that you give to other people!
3) Be kind to yourself.
This is something which I also suck at and am constantly trying to work on. If it helps write down 3-5 things each day that you’re grateful for. Give thanks to your body for supporting you through the day. Most importantly remind yourself that you are unique, you are special and you are beautiful because no one else compares to you. Having a flat stomach does NOT define your beauty, in fact having a little pooch on your tummy is a good thing because it protects your organs! Remember that no body is perfect, we all have insecurities and that’s what makes us human.
4) Remember that calorie counting is absolute shit.
It’s pressurising as hell and for a foodie like myself it’s honestly depressing. Food is our energy and gives us fuel. I honestly believe that the key to living a healthy life is to simply eat a balanced diet. Avoid processed food as much as possible, eat lots of fruit and veg, drink 2-3 litres of water each day and exercise for at least 30 minutes each day. * Side Note: Never feel guilty about eating out, never feel guilty about eating an entire pack of biscuits and never feel guilty about indulging in an entire chocolate bar. *
5) Keep off the weighing scales.
I understand that this is a personal one for lots of women but I personally believe that it is addictive and damaging for our mental health. Our weight fluctuates on the daily depending on what we’ve eaten that day, where we are in our menstrual cycle and also how much exercise we’ve done. Never forget that the scales don’t just measure our fat but also our muscle! Do not let the dreaded scales define you.
6) Do yoga.
Honestly this is the golden point!! I’ve always loved yoga but since lockdown I have come to realise that it is an absolute saviour. Doing 30 minutes every/every other day has transformed my relationship with my body. I’d recommend ‘Yoga with Adrienne’ on YouTube who has a wonderful range of sessions and flows. Yoga has reminded me of how important it is to respect and love your body. It has strengthened my body, de-stressed me and helped me conquer the feeling of self-love.
Sending lots of love to my fellow women, we are one, lets empower each other together to live authentically and to always stay true to ourselves x
Accounts to follow on Instagram which promote a healthy body: ✨
• @ambardriscoll and her @bambycollective discussing ‘real’ body image
• @amalielee talking eating disorder recovery
• Mental health advocate @missmalinsara
• @bodypospipanda is a wonderful advocate for being kind to yourself
• @emmanuelle98's blog is a great read for ‘real talk’ about our bodies and being positive in ourselves
• @theinsecuregirlsclub promotes self confidence and helps us deal with insecurities
Accounts for skin confidence: goodbye airbrushing, hello reality✨
• @izzierodgers and @theblemishqueen are two of many brilliant accounts for acne sufferers.
• If you’ve struggled with your skin then I feel you, it is hell on wheels. The good thing is there are lots of girls out there sharing their journey’s with us- use the hashtag #skinpositivity to find some wonderful accounts
Accounts for food and exercise positivity: ✨
• @adrienelouise and her YouTube channel ‘Yoga with Adrienne’ is a wonder
• @rosi_eatz has some delicious, healthy and nutritious recipes
• @hannah_eats gives us some mouth watering recipes and just all round delicious food
Eves x